Seuss: The Real Story
by Illeana Starbright
Summary: What really happened when Jojo picked up the hat? If he hadn't Horton and Gertrude would have never fallen in love, Horton never would have been called crazy, and we never would have worried about a clover. But it did and 1 bird fell for the wrong boy.
1. Safe to Say

_Safe To Say_

Everything would have stayed normal in the land created by Seuss if only Jojo hadn't shaken the characters off of the pages. Horton would have never been persecuted for talking to a dust speck and sitting on an egg and Mr. and Mrs. Mayor wouldn't have had a son among all those girls who would cause all sorts of trouble. The Battle of Butter would never have been fought and Dani would have never fallen for the wrong boy. Everything would have been ordinary for the characters brought to life by Dr. Seuss. But Jojo had to find the hat and that is where all the trouble began. Let's start from the beginning shall we?


	2. Some Kind of Hat Wearing Cat

_Some Kind of Hat Wearing Cat_

It had been an ordinary day for Jojo. It was raining and there was nothing to do at home. His parents were gone and weren't going to be back for hours. The baby sitter was more interested in talking to her boyfriend on the phone than playing with him. That was when he found it. The most splendid bizarre hat he had ever seen. _What kind of creature would wear such a hat?_ Jojo asked himself. Then he had it. "Some kind of a hat wearing cat," he cried out joyfully. That was when the world spun around him. When it settled he was in a blank world in a spotlight. That was when a cat in a tuxedo and tie stepped over to join him.

"I can see you've got quite a mind for your age. Why on think and you've dragged me right on to the world's stage. Now I'm here and there's no telling what may ensue; with a cat such as me and a thinker like you," the cat proudly told him. Then he began to sing. "Oh the thinks you can think. Oh the thinks you can think. If you're willing to try. Think invisible ink or a gink with a stink or a stair to the sky. If you open your mind oh the thinks you will find lining up to get loose. Oh the thinks you can think when you think about…" here the cat paused.

"Seuss!" voices yelled from behind him. Jojo turned to look and saw a variety of creatures stepping out from thin air. Some of them were tiny until they came down to join him. Others were huge and obviously from a jungle of sorts. Jojo stared at them in wonder as they sang and all kinds of possibilities swam into his head. Maybe this afternoon wouldn't be so bad after all. Then the song ended and they all vanished into the shadows except for the cat.

"Now what happens?" Jojo asked. The cat put on his hat and smiled.

"Our story begins with a very strange sound," he began mysteriously, "the drums of a jungle beginning to pound." Then Jojo heard the drums thumping and felt their beat through his shoes. He smiled in delight. "Now imagine a sky."

"I'll imagine bright blue," Jojo cut in. Ordinarily he would have been punished for interrupting but the cat just smiled.

"It's the Jungle of Nool," the cat proclaimed grandly.

"Near the River Walloo," Jojo added and the scene before him opened in full. In walked four gaudily dressed girls with poufy tails and short dresses. "Who are they?" Jojo asked in a whisper.

"The bird girls," the cat answered. "They're Mayzie La Bird's followers. The one in yellow is Sheena, the one in pink is Josie, the one in orange is Chlamydia, and the one in purple is Dani." Jojo stared at them in wonder. With their skirts just above their tanned knees and their brilliant tails they were easily the most beautiful girls he had seen in his life. "Now think of an elephant lumbering through," the cat proclaimed loudly.

"Horton," Jojo proclaimed happily.

"Yes Horton," the cat confirmed. "Horton hears a Who." Horton began to sing as he narrated about a speck of dust floating through the air and then hearing a voice calling. Horton saved the dust speck and then a new character stomped in.

"Humph," proclaimed a green and brown kangaroo. "Twas the Sour Kangaroo," the odd creature proclaimed. "And the young kangaroo in her pouch said…" the kangaroo prodded her pouch slightly.

"Humph," a small green and brown kangaroo said, sticking her head out.

"Too," the Sour Kangaroo finished. "Why that speck is as small as the head of a pin. A person on that why there never has been." Then she howled with laughter. "You're the biggest blame fool in the Jungle of Nool and I don't care who I tell," she began. Jojo glared indignantly at her and then glanced at the cat.

"Why is she doing this?" Jojo asked the cat.

"She can't hear anything," the cat explained to Jojo. That was when more trouble arrived. Horton had just finished defending himself with Jojo saw a dark shadow lurking in the trees.

"Ha laughed a voice!" someone cried and a figure jumped into view. It was a boy with a curling brown tail and black leather jacket on over top of a white shirt and jeans. Everyone jumped.

"Ha laughed some others," three more monkey boys yelled as they jumped out.

"Ha, ha, ha laughed the Wickersham brothers," the cried and began laughing gleefully. The bird girls all glared at them except for the one the cat had called Dani. She glanced at them curiously until the one next to her, Josie, smacked her. Then she flushed slightly and glared at the brothers as well. Soon however the bird girls were caught up in the beat of the music. A new player then came to Horton the elephant's defense.

"I'm Gertrude McFuzz and I live right next door," a plain green and white bird-girl proclaimed. "He's never done anything crazy before."

"Biggest blame fool in the Jungle of Nool," the rest of the characters proclaimed gleefully.

"He's always been friendly and loyal and kind. I just don't believe Horton's out of his mind," Gertrude finished shyly. She was quickly dismissed but a gaudy bird-girl in red and black with lots of sparkles. The bird girls cooed cheerfully over her.

"I'm Mayzie La Bird and I live in that tree," she said pointing to it. "Enough about Horton, let's talk about me." For a moment she stole the show and then everything slowly faded down and the figures slipped out of view leaving Jojo staring at what he could see of the jungle in awe.


	3. First Sighting

_First Sighting_

As the bird girls slipped off into their jungle paradise Dani noticed that her sister Josie and Josie's two friends Sheena and Chlamydia were staring at her oddly. "What?" she asked them finally.

"You were looking at one of _them_," Chlamydia accused.

"You shouldn't be looking at them. They're just dumb monkeys," Sheena added. Josie rolled her eyes at Dani over the top of Sheena's head.

"It's fine if we look as long as nobody notices," Josie defended. "It gives them something to think about." Sheena and Chlamydia quickly nodded in agreement. Because Josie was Mayzie's number one bird girl they always agreed with her. Josie had been standing up for Dani for a long time. After all Dani was the shy awkward bird girl who copied her older and more fashionable sister. Dani knew she was lucky to have a sister as kind and understanding as Josie.

The Wickersham's jungle hideout was surrounded by thick banana trees that choked out the rather thin Trufula trees. "You like her don't you?" on taunted, hanging by his tail from a branch.

"Oh shut up Axel," the one sitting to the side of him said. "Our brother wouldn't abandon us for a bird girl."

"Yes he would. Especially one as pretty as her," Axel argued back. "You don't know anything Terrell." Terrell rolled his eyes and was about the retort when the third placed a hand over his mouth.

"Let Zach explain," Ian, the oldest of the brothers, said. Axel and Terrell silenced and turned to look at their forth and youngest brother.

Zach looked up and brushed a hand through dark curls. "I just thought, well…" he trailed off for a moment, gathering his thoughts before continuing. "Wouldn't it be grand if I could get her away from the others, make her my girl. You know how put off Mayzie would be?" Axel and Terrell looked at each other, wonder and delight dawning on their faces.

"If that's all," Axel began.

"Then we'll help," Terrell finished before they both plunged into the trees. Ian gave Zach a knowing wink before vanishing as well.


	4. Whoville

_Whoville_

Jojo watched as the green and white bird stayed on the stage. "On the fifteenth of May, Miss. Gertrude McFuzz discovered how truly unique Horton was. But she knew to approach him would probably fail," here she paused in her singing to say glumly, "cause who'd notice a bird?" She paused again to take a deep breath. "With a one feather tail?" she sang. Then she trudged sadly off the stage.

Then the cat stood up and announced, "Then the voice came again calling over and over,"

"Help," cried a tiny voice from somewhere.

"So he tried to think who might be down on that clover," the cat finished.

"Hello," Horton called. "Is anyone there? Who are you?" Then Jojo saw a dark haired woman in a long blue dress and a proper man in a black suit with a blue tie.

"Well," the man began. "We're Whos here. We are Whos here smaller than the eye can see. It's true sir; we're Who's Who sir. I'm a Who and so is she."

Then the woman next to him joined him in song. "We're tiny little people blowing by in the air wondering how and why. We're on Who, the tiniest planet in the sky." Jojo watched in amazement as other people walked out singing and a town unfolded. Jojo saw busses and houses. He saw streets and the Grinch and grocery stores. He saw a marching band thump through town and heard about the tragedy of the trufula trees. Then he heard Horton promise to protect the town. Then as people bustled about the cat took over again.

"An invisible world; amazing but true. We'll leave Horton to listen and we'll zoom in on Who," the cat said. "But guess who enters the story now?"

"Who?" Jojo asked.

"You," the cat exclaimed and whisked Jojo into a neat house. Inside the house were the two neatly dressed people who had begun the Who's song. The two spoke for a moment and then the cat said, "And here's their son Jojo." The cat pushed Jojo into the house.

"In trouble again," the woman exclaimed worriedly.

"Cause his thinks take him places where no one has been," the man said, joining her.

Then the man stood upright and said, "I'm the mayor of Who, why I've just been elected, and upright behavior is thus forth expected."

"But we've just had a talk with your teachers today and they didn't have one single good thing to say," his wife interrupted tearfully.

"You've invented new thinks witch defy all description," the mayor scolded sternly.

"You gave Miss. O'Dooley a nervous conniption," his wife continued mournfully.

"Your thinks were so wild they disrupted your classes and made Miss. Mackle-Who drop her knew glasses which is why you're suspended. Yes that's what they said. Young man what in who has gotten into your head," Mr. Mayor yelled.

"I…umm…well," Jojo stammered.

"Now Horton has found us. We're safe on a clover, but clearly _our_ troubles are far, far from over," Mr. Mayor said, cutting Jojo off. Jojo felt tears gather in his eyes and Mrs. Mayor rushed over to him worriedly.

"We don't mean to scold you, we love you, oh yes dear," she said, trying to comfort him. "But couldn't you try thinking just a bit less dear?"

"Stop telling such outlandish tales," Mr. Mayor said firmly.

"Stop turning minnows into whales," Mrs. Mayor added.

"Now take your bath and go to bed."

"And think some normal thinks instead," they finished together. They left Jojo in the bathroom and he turned to glare at the cat.


	5. McElligot's Pool

_McElligot's Pool_

"You got me in trouble. Now please go away," Jojo cried as he slipped into the warm water of the leaky bathtub.

"All right, I'll get going, but first," the cat said. "Think of water and fish."

"Fish?" Jojo asked. "McElligot's Pool." The song rushed through him as his imagination went wild. "It's possible," Jojo sang. The cat nodded and smiled encouragingly. To Jojo's delight and surprise fish appeared all around him. He was in the middle of wrapping up his song when the bathroom door swung open. The fish vanished instantly and the cat dove behind the bathtub.

"Jojo the tubs overflowed onto the floor. The water is running right under the door," Mr. Mayor exclaimed irritably.

"The ceiling is pealing, you've flooded the den. Oh Jojo I think you've been thinking again," Mrs. Mayor added mournfully.

"I say this with firmness and terrible sorrow; young man we will deal with you come tomorrow," Mr. Mayor said and they both left the bathroom.

"I still think that I'm not such a fool when I sit here and fish in McElligot's Pool," Jojo sang softly.

"It's possible," The cat added.

"Anything's possible," Jojo, the cat and the fish sang. Then Jojo drained the water from the tub, changed into his pajamas and went to his bedroom. He paused for a moment outside his parent's room.

"He was mommy's little boy," his mother sang.

"He was daddy's little man," his father added.

"He was never any trouble till this thinking thing began," They sang together.

"We must both lay down the law," Mr. Mayor sang.

"Will he hate us?" Mrs. Mayor asked tearfully.

"Maybe so," Mr. Mayor admitted.

"Oh where are the instructions on how to raise a child? Who has the instructions on how to raise a child? Who has all the answers? I don't know," they sang together. Jojo felt bad he had let his parents down. He sadly went to his room.


	6. The Military

_The Military_

Mr. and Mrs. Mayor found a brochure on their kitchen table the next morning. "Does your child cause you trouble with his wild thinking?" Mr. Mayor read.

"Do his grades keep on shrinking and shrinking?" Mrs. Mayor read over his shoulder.

Then they began to read as one. "As a parent are you overwhelmed, insecure? The help you need is inside this brochure." They smiled at each other and quickly read. Mr. Mayor made the necessary call and arrangements and then they were on their way to wake Jojo up.

"It's nine son. Rise and shine son; it's a very special day," Mr. Mayor said.

"Get dressed dear. Look your best dear. Soon you will be on your way," Mrs. Mayor added.

"Here is your pencil."

"Here are your mittens."

"Here is your sword," They said together handing Jojo a large blue butter knife.

"My sword?" Jojo asked. His parents smiled and led him onto the lawn. A large man with a mustache was waiting for them there.

"I'm General Genghis Khan Smits. I scare children out of their wits," the man proclaimed. "But you'll see at a glancer my school is the answer for shirkers, dreamers, and twits; and in this case I'd say the shoe fits." Jojo felt his face flush with embarrassment. "Ten hut. Feet together, chin up, eyes on the prize. Foreword, harch," the man yelled. Jojo marched awkwardly foreword. "The military academy is the place where he should be sent. We'll drill the silliness from his head; I'm sure we'll make a dent. We'll teach him fighting and left and righting until his muscled and tan. A hut two three, he's pathetic. A hut two three, unathletic. A hut two three but I'm betting we can. The military that's what makes a boy, a man."

Lots of boys Jojo's age or older marched over say "Smits, Smits, Smits, Smits."

"A hut two three; we'll enlist 'em. A hut two three; in our system. And boys will see nothing's easier than the military that's what makes a boy, a man," Smits sang proudly. Jojo saw his parents being reeled in by Smits ideas. "Our boys believe in the right of every Who to eat their bread butter side up."

"Butter side up," the boys yelled.

"One thing we trust on this fragile speck of dust is eating bread butter side up."

"Butter side up?" Jojo questioned.

"And as for those who like their butter down; we'll go to war and run them out of town," Smits sang proudly. "The military that's what makes a boy, a man." Then Smits led Jojo and the others away from his home and Jojo's two fooled and hopeful parents. "I do not like green eggs and ham," Smits yelled.

"I do not like green eggs and ham," the boys yelled back.

"I do not like them Sam I Am."

"I do not like them Sam I Am."

"Sound off."

"Eggs and ham."

"Sound off."

"Sam I Am."

"I do not like green eggs…and ham," they all yelled.

Jojo was left in a small military style room feeling alone and melancholy. That was when he heard the voice.


	7. Alone In The Universe

_Alone in the Universe_

"I've been guarding this clover for over a week getting laughing at for thinking a dust speck can speak," Horton said. "Well let them all laugh. I will try not to mind for I have found something that they'll never find." He took a deep breath and began to sing. "There are secrets in a leaf, in the water, in the air. Hidden planets, tiny worlds all invisible. Not a person seems to know; not a person seems to care. There is no one who believes a thing I say. Well sometime or other I'm fairly certain great thinkers all feel this way. I'm alone in the universe, so alone in the universe. I've found magic but they don't see it. They all call me a lunatic; okay call me a lunatic. If I stand on my own so be it. Cause I have wings, yes I can fly around the moon and far beyond the sky. And someday soon I know there you'll be; one small voice in the universe, one true friend in the universe, who believes in me."

Jojo felt the need to sing next. "I'm alone in the universe, so alone in the universe. My own planets and stars are glowing."

"Alone in the universe," Horton sang.

"No one notices anything. Not one person is listening. They don't have any way of knowing."

"Nobody knows that I have wings,"

"I have wings," Jojo cut in.

"And I can fly. Around the moon and far beyond the sky. And someday soon I know there you'll be; one small voice in the universe."

"One true friend in the universe."

"Who believes in me," they sang together. Then they began to talk and Jojo lost track of time. The next thing he knew was Horton saying "Good night Jojo."

"Good night Horton. See you in Solla Sollew," Jojo replied. Then he yawned and fell asleep the instant his head hit the perfectly starched pillow.


	8. Amazing Mayzie's Amazing Debut

_Amazing Mayzie's Amazing Debut_

"Wake up the scenes over. There's more to be heard. There exits our hero. Who enters?" The cat asked Jojo, shaking him awake.

"The bird," Jojo said. That was when Gertrude entered with her small green and white tail.

"Love song for Horton number four hundred sixty-two," she announced rather sadly. "Da-do, da-do, da-doo-do-do-da-do. There once was a girl bird named Gertrude McFuzz and she had the smallest plain tail ever was. One droopy droop feather was all that she had, and oh that one feather made Gertrude so sad," she sang as she strummed a ukulele. "She curled it, she dyed it, she gave it a puff. She decked it with flowers but it wasn't enough. For no matter what it just was what it was; a tail that simply wasn't meant… to catch the eye of an elephant… the one feather tail of Miss. Gertrude McFuzz." That was when the music changed and the flouncy red bird shimmied in followed by the bird girls.

"Hey girl how ya doin'," Mayzie called out.

"Poor little tail," a bird girl added while the others giggled, Dani a little more half-hearted than the rest.

"Poor little Gertrude, such a sorry sight," Mayzie said with fake sympathy. "Well I'll take you under my wing and baby you'll be all right." Then she began to sing to a salsa beat. "I was once a plain little bird like you kid. One pathetic feather was all I grew… I had nothing show-offish. What's a plain bird to do? And there's certainly nothing show-offish on you," she finished condescendingly.

"Thank-you Mayzie," Gertrude said sourly.

"Then I made a plan for my self-improvement. No more crumbs I vowed, I would take the cake! Yes, I went to the doctor."

"Doctor Dake by the lake," the bird girls sang, gesturing towards his office nest to the left over a small lake.

"And he told me what sort of a pill I should take," Mayzie finished grandly. "Now I'm… Amazing Mayzie as feathered as feathered can be now. Amazing Mayzie, it was all for sale."

"Amazing Mayzie," the bird girls sang as Gertrude watched in reluctant awe.

"The birds are all whistling at me now."

"Amazing Mayzie."

"Baby that's my tail," Mayzie said swishing it flashily near Gertrude.

"High or low," the bird girls sang.

"Gee its fabulous," Gertrude said.

"Watch her go."

"Gee I'm envious."

"Two and fro, Mayzie's fabulous tail."

"I wish I had one like it."

"Left and right."

"Best I've ever seen."

"Day or night."

"Kid you're turning green," Mayzie said lazily.

"What a sight, Mayzie's fabulous tail."

"Get those pills," Mayzie sang.

"Get the pills," the bird girls added."

"And you can have frills. "

"Your Horton is certain to see. And you can be amazing," Mayzie and the bird girls sang.

"Well almost," Mayzie said with a pause. "As amazing as me." Then she flounced off as a plan began to form on Gertrude's face. The bird girls stayed to watch.


	9. Amazing Gertrude is Born

_Amazing Gertrude is Born_

"So she flew to the doctor, the doctor named Dake whose office was high on a tree by the lake. She said Mr. Doctor oh please do you know of some sort of pill that would make my tail grow," Gertrude pleaded. The doctor said something in a foreign language that made Gertrude and the bird girls stare at him in confusion. "Huh?" Gertrude asked.

"In other words," the doctor proclaimed grandly, "your tail is just right for your kind of bird."

Gertrude shrieked loudly then. "So Gertrude had tantrums, she raised such a den, that finally the doctor just **had to give in**."

"All right already; bring in the pillberry bush," the doctor said, vanishing into his nest. A thing brought out the bush and took Gertrude's ukulele. Gertrude picked a few pills and examined them.

"Gulp, gulp, gulp," she swallowed several of them tentatively. "What was that, something's itching me? What was that, something's twitching me? What was that? Are those feathers I see? I think my tails beginning. Oh my word; this is wonderful! Second third; ooh I'm colorful! What a bird I'm beginning to be. Amazing Gertrude."

"Just look at that tail she's a sportin'," the bird girls sang. "Amazing Gertrude."

"Thank you Doctor Dake."

"Thanks Doc. Amazing Gertrude."

"And hopefully I'll impress Horton."

"Amazing Gertrude."

"One more pill will do me good; yes it will. One more, one more, one more pill."

"Soon she'll have the biggest tail. She'll have the biggest tail."

"I'll have the biggest tail."

"The biggest tail of," they sang together.

"All," Gertrude sang, turning to reveal a huge purple, dark blue, and green tail. The bird girls helped her carry her tail out of view.

"Now Gertrude is happy. Her tail's nice and long," Jojo said.

"Hold on to your hat kid cause now things go wrong," The cat said.


	10. Monkey Around

_Monkey Around_

A lone hat slid into view. It was followed by three more in quick succession and then the Wickersham brothers flipped into view to retrieve their hats. "There's a rustle in the bushes. There's a tremble in the trees. Hear it like a whisper, smell it on a summer breeze," Zach sang.

"Mm-hm," the rest all sang.

"Something big is getting nearer. Something big is coming through. Got some monkey business, that's what we intended to do," Zach sang.

"Come on I wanna monkey, monkey around. Come on, we wanna monkey, monkey around. Come on I wanna monkey, ooh we wanna monkey around. Ooh," they all sang. An unsuspecting Horton walked into view with his clover.

"Oh, the Wickershams, um, hello," Horton said tentatively as the monkey brothers surrounded him.

"Well it's bigger than a bread box," Axel said.

"Hey it's wider than a whale," Terrell added.

"Peanut butter breath," Zach said.

"And scared to death from head to tail," they all sang.

"So you're still talking to dust, oh that's hot," Ian said.

"A dust speck that's all full of Whos who are not," Axel added.

"There aren't any Whos, why I don't hear a sound," Terrell finished.

"Come on we wanna monkey, monkey around," they all sang and then Axel grabbed Horton's clover and they dashed off, tossing it around and teasing Horton. Zach was the last one onto the narrow path in the woods and he hesitated before Dani a moment. Then he kissed her on the mouth and darted off after his brothers.


End file.
